What’s the weirdest phone call you have ever received?

After a few moments he returns.

Hi this is Sargent Moss from the County detention center. Is this Sean?

HELLO

Do you ever feel like you are doing good, but would do better if people hadn’t blamed you or even bothered you? I have gotten lonely, but I always am up to something (creating my destiny).

{RING} {RING}

I was trying to reach out to you because we have a Mr X here, who claims you are his legal guardian. He needs you to come down and sign some forms.

Do what? Officer, I'm sorry I have no kids of my own, and I don't know anybody by that name.

In my experience, British people are fat, ugly and arrogant. Why is it and can it be changed?

I'm sorry to bother you, my staff just told me our guy corrected his information and had a number off for his home phone. Have a good day. Hangs up.

ATTENTION SPIKES UP. What could he want with me? Did I do something wrong? Lord did I forget to pay something? Questions start flying through my head. What would the detention center sheriff want with me?

Looks at phone, sees a number local to me, so I answered.

Is anal sex allowed in Islam? It's not written anywhere in the Quran whether it's forbidden or not.

Yes sir it is.

I hear a pause on the line, it goes quiet for a few seconds.

Do you reside at 1234 X X Lane?

Have you ever been humiliated in front of a group of girls and enjoyed it?

No sir I sure don't, I live in the next city over.

Sure no problem officer.

Is your number (xxx) xxx-xxxx??

Have you ever regretted not hitting on a older women?

Whew, not in trouble!! But someone named Sean with a similar number is apparently about to have a rather bad day.

Long pause, OK. (Inaudible talking). Could you hang on for just a sec?